Guilty

If I hear one more time this week, "How do you do it all... I mean, don't your kids suffer?" in regards to my running and training, I think I am going to scream!

Actually, my kids are NOT suffering. Children in Japan after the devastating earthquake are suffering. Homeless children, hungry children, children with out someone to love them ARE suffering.

Just because I am training... A LOT, does NOT mean that I am not giving my kids the attention and love they need. And the judgments that other mothers put on us for taking time for ourselves... NOT COOL!

I am obsessed... I admit it. Guilty as charged there, but my kids are not negatively affected by it. 90% of my workouts are while the kids are in school or when they are sleeping. So, tell me how this is affecting them? Affecting my husband, and house work; maybe, but my children? I do not think so. And are you telling me that working mothers who DO take time away from their children, love them any less?

Sure there have been times that my kids break into tears when I leave for a long run on Saturday morning or ask me, "Can you not run today!" I remember a very clear moment about a year ago where my closed my front door on two crying children staring at my through the glass begging me to stay home. My response, "Mommy needs to run. It makes her a better mommy!"

Any one looking into our life at that exact moment would be thinking... "Ugh, what a selfish mother". But seriously, they missed the 2 hours I spent just before this making their favorite breakfast (chocolate chip pancakes is our Saturday morning norm here) and playing whatever game they asked me to play, which often times is them hanging all over me. Did I purposely devote those 2 hours to them because I knew that I would be leaving for a long workout and they would miss me? ABSOLUTELY. I mean, I could have slept in and crept out of the house without them noticing... but I didn't. I could have thrown laundry in the washer and started my Saturday morning chores, but I didn't. I laid there, squashed on the floor, while my daughter sat on my back and my son tried to stand on her shoulders (yes, we are training for the circus) thinking, boy this floor needs to be vacuumed.

I think a LOT of these guilty comments that other mothers give us is because they are unhappy with their situation. The idea of getting up at 3:30am to get a run in outside before their husband leaves for work sounds insane... yeah... it was pretty insane (only did that 1 time last summer). The idea that fingerprints can remain on doors, and floors can go a day without being cleaned is crazy. The idea of leaving two crying children at the front door while daddy is home is DEMENTED!

But it does make me a better mother. When I return from these workouts (okay, after I shower), I feel relaxed (not just tired) and ready for whatever they throw at me. Have I snuck in a workout with the kids (hey, lets go bike riding and mommy will run and chase you)? Yes! Have I given up runs to be with them? YES! Have I missed races because they had something going on? Of course!

Love that I caught them in a giggle!

I am a mother, who cannot imagine this world without my children. They are the loves of my life. I am so blessed to be given the chance to be their mother, to love them unconditionally. I do not take that for granted!

Oh and by the way: my house is probably cleaner than most of "those" mothers who pass judgement on me... just say'in!